the juicy years

As questions came up for me this morning,  I heard the call. It ’s been a while since I created space to write, even though in the last 12 months there’s been more time than ever!  Though it’s challenged us all in many ways,  it’s also a gift. A huge transformational time on earth that we in our 3 rd  chapter can experience. Having lived through many decades of change and/or struggle, we can be a source of calm and wisdom for others, and our loved ones.  Numerous people have written inspiring articles and engaged in philosophical conversations about this period in time. For me, I’m focusing on how to stay present, contented and healthy to ride out the next few years of uncertainty. I’m not concerned about where we’re headed as any fear is more detrimental to our health than any virus.  Don’t allow fear to call the shots! Action is also a potent antidote to fear, and here’s one step to start – a True Vitality TEST that you can complete on the Blue Zones research website which is a wond

Hello bibliophiles...for some months I've needed to press the Pause button on this blog as other life priorities took precedence.    But here I am again, coincidentally, with the upcoming annual Byron Writer's Festival that promises us lively conversations, workshops and talks.    My recent dive into a fascinating book from my library ' Women Who Love Books Too Much: Bibliophiles, Bluestockings & Prolific Pens from the Algonquin Hotel to the YA-YA Sisterhood , by author Brenda Knight, inspired me to start a book discussion group on this same topic.  An yes, I'm a Bibliophile like Brenda! Though I've read about and studied many of the women in this book, there are many more who I hadn't heard of.  Could other women be interested as well, in learning and discussing them in a group? Brenda pays tribute to a range of pioneering women who've paved the way for us. Many escaped the public eye, some survived jailing, name-calling, reje

Growing old gracefully ...disgracefully ... outrageously ...or whatever other term that's been used to embrace ageing in the last few years, has now been replaced with a more optimistic term "Positive Ageing" - the principles of the Positive Psychology movement. Our ability to have a more positive experience, compared with peers who are perpetuating the old paradigm (that ageing is fraught with misery), has a lot to do with our attitude, personal qualities and flexibility. Cultivating flexibility I think is a key indicator of how we reframe our lives in these years. It requires us to feel and think differently, to counter any maladaptive patterns by engaging in life-enhancing practices. Some of these are altruistic, others may be practising gratitude, and appreciating what you have to offer to the world. Go on now, write a list of your qualities, skills and resources! And think about how some of these could be used creatively to enhance your life or the li

Alone versus Lonely has come to my attention lately w hen I read that more women are living alone today than at any other time in herstory.  Given that therapists in the USA are a little concerned about the emotional health of these millions of women, it piqued my interest.  On googling this topic it seems there are many variables when it comes to how people feel about living alone.  As I'm a passionate informal researcher (post Social Ecology academia) of our 3rd chapter, I will continue to gather stories, and the next 20 years will no doubt attract much interest from other social researchers. To give you a glimpse of the growing singledom status, let's look at the USA for example.  1/4 of adult American women have never married Divorce has tripled since the 1950's Nearly 12 million women are widows 51% of women live without spouses The number of single person households and life alone has been gathering public health attention especially in relation

Recently I developed and facilitated two Writing Groups for Elders in my local community.   I believed it was important for them to  explore topics and emotions that might normally remain hidden, for healing in their 3rd Chapter. To  hear others' stories and realise that they are not alone.   beginnings . . . I set about creating a safe container for these feelings and stories to flow, in a non-judgmental way, where they could feel safe in sharing their life if they chose to.   T hey also had the opportunity to practise writing more creatively. The feedback from participants has been encouraging, and positive. And I am grateful for their trust in me, in each other, and their own process.   One said she "liked the topics and themes that you suggested for us and the quotes and poems were a bonus...I loved the warm feeling that was created in the group and I think one of the reasons for this was the way we were led into some deep little recesses of our lives tha

I shared a memory with a friend recently, on Facebook. It was a photo of us 20 years ago that evoked a feeling of shared joy. But she also commented that she'd like to "turn back the clock". That started me thinking about how life would be, even if we turned the clock back 10 years, to pre FB.  How might we be using these hours in a way that nurtures us more deeply? The time that social media has snatched from us? And who would we be without our technology? Michael Harris, in his book “ The End of Absence ” suggests that soon enough people will struggle to remember life before the Internet.  Would we be more engaged in our local community? Be more able to churn out that book, or paint more pictures? So how do we extract ourselves, even a little, for fear of losing our seemingly community of 'friends'. Many would have withdrawal symptoms. The longest offline time for me was a week.  Michael goes on to say "And today’s rarest

In these winter months it's an opportune time for reflection.  What makes your life meaningful in your elder years? As our lifespan is greater than any generation before us, we can shape ourselves into the kind of elder we want to be.  It's an extraordinary time to be alive!  We now have a smorgasbord of activities and experiences to delve into. Waking up feeling optimistic about your day is a sure sign that your life has meaning.  For many, this time is for re-defining oneself.  Perhaps  mourning the loss of our younger self, or identity?  Letting go of one's former identity can be difficult for some. In our quest to live meaningfully, I believe it’s to live authentically, in alignment with our values and personal ethos. With renewed confidence and a “so what” attitude, our 3 rd  chapter  can be the most joyful and meaningful time of our lives. Have you ever asked yourself "Who am I ?" During our early years we may have searched