Monday, December 15, 2014

Surrendering to Life

How do we sustain ourselves in times of change and uncertainty?
                                                                                                                                                             
Some of my followers would know about my challenges of late, so I'll share how I've come to this place now, of surrender.  Surrender doesn't mean weakness, or giving up. It's a space where you let go of pushing for an outcome, or wanting to know why, or how things will turn out. When my life made a roundabout turn, I had to remind myself daily to be so very present. I was called to trust once again in the divine plan of my soul, and accept what I was given. 

In the early weeks of my unforeseen direction, I felt like a ship without a rudder. Isolated and alone. 

Each person has their own life situation, so there are no rules. Finding what works for you is the key, whether you are still at work, grand-parenting, caring for someone, or ill.

The following are some strategies and tips that I used that may help others to get through a period of deep change or uncertainty. In this period I eventually learned to live the days and the weeks, without any expectation.

TRUST

Trusting that what you are going through could include some gifts. Gifts or insights that might not be clear until much later down the track.

The first sign of acceptance was when I felt better emotionally and physically stronger. I think that's a huge part of dealing with change - feeling equipped to cope, and knowing how to self-care. 

It's vital to find a 'sista,' or if you have a real one, lean on her!  I had both a sister, daughters and friends, so I was lucky. She/they will also remind you of your worth, your purpose, and hopefully make you laugh. A good belly laugh is good for one's soul, to move that flat feeling energy up from the heart, into the throat and out into space with roars of laughter. 

Take self out on a date - any type of date will do. I have enjoyed many of these dates over the years since reading Julia Cameron's book. My 'change' dates included my love of photographing nature, some serious op shopping, and having regular coffee at our village cafe where I connected with whoever was there. 

Get ONLINE and stay connected - this is a gift in times of isolation. I let go of the thought of "addiction to social media" and regularly chatted to friends and made new ones. 

A regular meditative practice and prayer, together with nourishing food sustained me, as well as many carefully chosen, uplifting movies.

Reach out, talk to anyone if they are open to listening. Don't hesitate to phone friends, and don't worry about what they might think. They'll soon tell you if they're busy. Real friends will willingly support you, and I am so grateful for a few of mine for this support. I made a joke of telling them that I "had to exercise my voice box" and that would get a laugh out of them, I literally had to phone someone every day as I had little contact with the outside world in the first few weeks after hospital, living in a new community, and immobile.

Commit to learning new skills in this time of 'not knowing', even though you might not feel in the mood. If you're working, then find a new relaxing pastime on the weekend. Just do something that you might have thought of doing one day, when you had time! I learned some valuable skills and online marketing strategies (at the expense of getting a sore neck).  

Engage the creative spark within!  It's never too late to write that story, make that dress, or paint that picture. 

We never know what new growth and juicy treats might be around the next bend in the road.